Although we'd all like to be magicians in the kitchen, even the most skilled chefs face occasional food flops. Nutritionists in particular often start out with best intentions to "healthify" a dish, but sometimes it morphs into something disastrous instead of delicious.
Such was the case when I tried to do something sweet for my kids. I had workmen coming to scape and polish the wood floor in my office at 6 a.m. on a Sunday, so I thought I could make use of that extra time before my kids woke up to bake cookies. What's better than waking up to the smell of fresh-baked cookies? Lots of things, it turns out.
I baked for hours. My boys came down the stairs and were greeted with a giant batch of cookies looking delicious and welcoming. But they tasted exactly like… drumroll, please… polyurethane! Apparently the dough had absorbed all of the odors of the chemicals used to shine my floors. So my boys were out of luck, and my garbage got to enjoy every single crumb of my best intentions. Talk about a food #fail. The moral of this story? I should have curled up with a good novel.
So don't despair the next time you have a kitchen mishap – you're cooking, that's what matters! Here are five more food fail stories from fellow nutritionists to boost your spirits.
Meatball Muffin Mistake
"As an RDN I usually try to have healthy snacks on hand that are quick and easy to grab. One day I tried these flax, walnut, apple muffins for the first time thinking the kids will LOVE them. Unfortunately, they didn't turn out to look as good as they tasted. My 12-year-old son wouldn't even try them and instead replied, 'Oh, I thought those were meatballs… No thanks.'"
- Kim Melton, RDN, Creator of the Nutrition Pro Consulting Blog
"When my son was in elementary school, he came home one day asking for a fruit smoothie but requesting that he make it by himself. As a dietitian and cookbook author, I was thrilled by his enthusiasm. His problem, though, was that he added too many frozen blueberries and not enough yogurt and juice. When the contents got stuck and wouldn't mix any more, he turned off the blender, removed the lid, and placed a spatula inside to stir up the clump. Apparently an air bubble within the mixture caused the contents to explode up as high as reaching the ceiling (not to mention the counters and floors). We all had a good laugh together, although the happiest person was the painter we had to hire to smooth over the smoothie remains."
- Liz Weiss, RDN, Blogger for Meal Makeover Moms' Kitchen and co-author, The Smoothie Bowl Coloring Cookbook
Botched Banana Bread
"This #foodfail was obvious as smoke wafted out of my oven and throughout the house. Although this was the same banana bread recipe I always used, it seems that this time, I loaded my pans far beyond where they should have been filled. I couldn't remember whether I used more pans the last time but I absolutely knew that for next time I was going to finally write down a specific recipe."
- Jodi Vandenheuvel Danen, RDN, of The Average RD
"I will finally admit it… I'm absolutely terrible at making cauliflower crust. I've tried many times to emulate those fabulous-looking cauliflower-crust pizzas displayed in magazines, but I seem to just end up with a soft, soggy mess. The last time, it even stuck to the pan. Since the flavor was still good, it's now known as my cauliflower Parmesan."
- Natalie Rizzo, RDN of Nutrition à la Natalie
Not Eggs-actly the Plan
"I tried to make these really cute, healthy deviled egg chicks for my kids for Easter. The instructions looked so easy and for someone who cooks, I figured… how hard could this be? Particularly since my kids are obsessed with deviled eggs, I was up for the challenge to create this dish for them. As it turned out, they were impossible for me to recreate. As a result, I ended up with egg salad."
- Abby Langer, RDN, of Abby Langer Nutrition